The Parrot News

All the News That's Fit to Parrot

Archives: Letters

  • Reader Objects To Tone

    Dear Editor, I am deeply concerned about The Parrot News’s flippant tone. The endless squawking of half-baked headlines and gossip creates an echo chamber of nonsense. Your parrots may be colorful, but their journalism is feather-light. Please encourage deeper reflection—before readers start mistaking repetition for truth. Sincerely,A Concerned Reader Dear Concerned Reader, Thank you for…

  • TPN Take Questioned

    To the Editor of The Parrot News, I’ve been following your publication for the past three days, and while I admire the colorful enthusiasm of your feathered correspondents, I can’t help but notice a glaring issue—you’re just repeating whatever nonsense is floating around the internet! I thought The Parrot News might offer a fresh, witty…

  • Reader Questions Recent Hire

    To the Editor, I’ve been a loyal reader of The Parrot News for days, but I have to ask: why on earth are we giving Anne T. Parrot a platform? Every time she squawks, it’s some sneering jab at another bird’s feathers or a smug quote from some long-dead philosopher she thinks makes her sound…

  • In Defense of Anne

    To The Editor, I read, with rising feathers and flared nostrils, the recent letter calling for Anne T. Parrot’s removal. Fired? Fired? For what—squawking too truthfully? Last I checked, this was still a free aviary. If Anne ruffles a few feathers, maybe those feathers needed ruffling. Not every parrot needs to chirp politely while pecking…

  • Calls to Cancel Karen

    To The Editor, I am absolutely reeling at the news that Karen—yes, that chronically squawking menace in a pearls-and-peroxide combo—is campaigning to close our libraries. From what I hear, Karen is still flapping mad because libraries use the Dewey Decimal System and that makes it impossible to find her cookbooks. Ha! Trust me on this…